By Claire Heinichen, ‘11, Lighter Fare Section Editor, and Xanni Brown, ‘10, former Lighter Fare Section Editor

We’re sure all of you read and were thoroughly enthralled with Cody Pomeranz’s 35 underrated songs you probably don’t have on your iPod. Honestly, who doesn’t love angsty teens with crazy piano riffs that didn’t have enough “umph” to make it to the mainstream? But as Xanni and I were slowly making our way through each song and appreciating its musical value, we realized something very important; The reason that the majority of teens don’t have these underrated “edgy” or “indie”  thrillers in their iTunes library is because the majority of them have maxed out their hard drives (sorry tech office!) and blown out their eardrums with songs they shouldn’t have on their iPods. So here it is, Xanni and I’s tell all list of songs you should immediately delete from your iTunes, not only to make room for emo tunes with catchy beats, but also because it’s just down right embarassing.

*DISCLAIMER* If you are a fan of Miley, Ga Ga, or any other artists that lack talent, please read no further.

35 overrated songs you probably shouldn’t have on your iPod:

1. I’m Blue (Da Ba Dee) – Eiffel 65

There is no justification needed for this one. It doesn’t even have words.

2. If You Seek Amy – Britney Spears

It is difficult to attempt to be clever while making no sense at all.

3. Hot ’N Cold– Katy Perry

A three year old could have written this song. Just tell them to come up with a list of the six most generic opposites and make them into sentences. “you’re hot then you’re cold, you’re yes then you’re no, you’re in then you’re out, you’re up then you’re down, you’re wrong when its right, its black and its white…” Very good little Katy!

4. London Bridge – Fergie

We’re still unaware why everytime “you” come around her “london bridge” wants to “go down like”. Again, nonsensical.

5. Barbie Girl – Aqua

At least the remake “I’m an ugly girl, my face makes you hurl” was clever…

6. Love Story – Taylor Swift

Now we’ll give T-Swift props for making a catchy tune, however she is under the strange impression that Romeo and Juliet ended well. *SPOILER ALERT* They both kill themselves. She also romanticizes adultery and shame (“but you were Romeo, I was a Scarlet Letter”). Just no. We’ll leave it at that.

7. Thong Song – Sisqo

He must have one proud set of parents.

8. Thug Story – Taylor Swift feat. T-Pain

“You don’t wanna fight me. In my extra small white tee!” No further explanation needed.

9. Cotton Eye Joe – Rednex

The low point of every middle and high school dance either of us have ever attended.

10. I Touch Myself – Divinyls

The true catalyst behind what must be the most uncomfortable karaoke sessions ever.

11. Sk8er Boi – Avril Lavigne

It’s all in the spelling. Although we do credit Avril with discovering that “He was a sk8er boi” does in fact rhyme with “she said see you l8er boi.”

12. Welcome to My Life – Simple Plan

The song is solely responsible for every “emo” kid under the age of twelve.

13. Right Round – Flo Rida feat. Ke$ha

We’re doubting the original artist, 1985’s Dead or Alive, intended for their lyrics “you spin me right round…like record baby right round” to be so throughoughly misconstrued.

14. Higher – Heidi Montag

In an interview surrounding the release of her latest album, Mrs. Speidi was asked to sing a little something from one of her songs. She responded with, “my vocal chords are still very sore from a recent operation.” Getting plastic surgery on your butt, nose, lips, stomach, and forehead has nothing to do with lack of talent.

15. Aaron’s Party (Come get it) – Aaron Carter

Nothing will ever live up to the lyrical genius that was “That’s How I Beat Shaq.”

16. White and Nerdy – Weird Al

As if “Ridin Dirty” wasn’t bad enough.

17. Macarena – Los Del Rio

Don’t even pretend like you know one word to this song other than “heeeey Macarena!”

18. Hollaback Girl – Gwen Stefani

We will give $10 to anyone who can tell us what a hollaback girl is. (Although we do thank Gwen for teaching the youth of America, ourselves included, the proper spelling of Bananas”)     This **** is Bananas,

B-A-N-A-N-A- S! Mr. Brownstein also likes this song. Enough said.

19. Stars and Blind – Paris Hilton

This one should be thrown in the stack with Hilary Duff, Lindsay Lohan, and other child film stars who were convinced that they could sing by some thourougly misguided soul. Although the film industry was never very nice to Paris (House of Wax), despite one certain film that was fairly successful…

20. Lip Gloss – Lil Mama

An entire song is needed to establish that her lip gloss is “poppin”. Next!

21. Blah Blah Blah – Ke$ha (or any other song featuring Ke$ha)

If she isn’t aware that $ is not part of the alphabet, then maybe she should take her  own advice and stop “talkin that blah blah blah.”

22. The Call – Backstreet Boys

Someone needs better phone service!

23. I’m Not a Girl, Not Yet a Woman – Britney Spears

Nothing screams identity crisis like striking ballad followed by a Vegas wedding, shaving your head, and going to rehab!

24.The Hoedown Throwdown – Miley Cyrus

The combination of Xanni’s two greatest fears: Line dancing and Miley Cyrus.

25. Anything by Lindsay Lohan

Yikes.

26. Party in the USA – Miley Cyrus

We’re sorry, but its true. We challenge Miley, in her next hit, to find a new way to nod her head and move her hips other than “like yeah.”

27. Chain Hang Low – Gibbs

The one hit wonder from hell.

28. Your Body is a Wonderland – John Mayer

This song is ten kinds of creepy.

29. Bad Romance – Lady Ga Ga

Terrifying. The video will give you nightmares.

30. Trapped in the Closet - R. Kelly

A 22-Chapter set of reasons why R. Kelly shouldn’t be a singer/rapper/actor/breather. Chapter 10 (where the midget has an “accident”) is our personal favorite.

31. Bedrock – Young Money

A bad pick up line gone WAY too far.

32. SOS – The Jonas Brothers

“Next time I see you, giving you a high five, cause hugs are overrated just FYI” mind you these guys are in their 20s.

33. Poppin’ My Collar – 3 6 Mafia

It’s a shame so many past CCD students have claimed this to be their anthem.

34. Baby – Justin Beiber ft. Ludacris

This song only has one word.

35. Bad Day – Daniel Powter

Nothing cheers us up more than being reminded musically that we are having a bad day.

Celebrity photos courtesy of: chicagonow.com; images.starpulse.com; images1.fanpop.com; bestweekever.tv; aolcdn.com; jenniferanistonwatch.com; media.onsugar.com.